Another new friend!
In my last post titled “Shifting Universe” http://wp.me/p3yLoX-n8 I mentioned the shifting or changing I was again sensing.
The winds of approaching Autumn are also evident; it marks the beginning of my favorite time of year. I think this next phase of my life will turn into another favorite. I’ve been awaiting it.
Mostly, it feels as if another life circle is coming around to close but I don’t feel it is the restrictive kind of closing. It is akin to Wednesdays in the work week, aka “hump day”. The uphill climb is cresting and soon there will be an easier downhill trek.
At least, that is my own personal take. I reject any other reality for this favored point of view.
So after my last post I was side-tracked by an ongoing eye condition that has been diagnosed differently now by three different ophthalmologists. The issue has been bugging me for months. I’ve been following various treatment regimens without improvement. The last one required me to administer some powerful eye drops four times each day. Problem was I had trouble reading (seeing) as a result. Not a wee bit of difficulty but a great deal of difficulty. So I did not post anything. Finally the good doctor changed my medication and I am hopeful things are permanently improving.
My last post was done one day before I was to finally meet face-to-face with my newest find from Match.com.
He and I were both curious to see each other in the flesh, tired of the fantasizing, wondering if there would be any chemistry.
I did not clarify this with him, but my take is that he wanted a woman slimmer than I. I am not skinny. I am not overweight, either, but certainly not overly thin. My doc feels I am just right. I FEEL just right, except for the wee bit of extra flab around my waist. Argh, this aging body is not as toned as it used to be. But it is healthy and happy.
As for his appearance, he was more slightly built than I prefer. I like a guy to be “average”. Even a bit more than average weight is OK as long as he is not several pounds overweight.
Too much weight indicates to me that he does not take care of his health. I want to hook up with someone who has the potential to remain on the planet for many more years. I also want a guy who can move around and do physical things with me, like walking and exploring and cuddling in weird positions.
Conversely, if a guy is too thin then I feel out of place as his match.
I know that is a personal issue. I accept it and hold to it.
He was definitely a nice guy though, and I am grateful that he took the time to stop by my town on his way to other business. He remains the type of person I know I would like to share a glass of wine or an ice cream cone with if we lived close to one another. So much in common – yet not enough to make a romantic relationship. And of course, we do not live easily close to one another.
I got to thinking – AGAIN – of this elusive chemistry thing.
I kinda feel there are two ways for the chemistry thing to take root in my brain:
1. Appearance, as in the first visual impression
2. Intellect, which can be more apparent if you first communicate without photos – weird but true
Which is best or most accurate?
When perusing online profiles of Mr. Potentials I normally move right on by those without photos.
For those with photos, I might still pass on the ones who write little to nothing.
Am I short-changing myself (or them)?
I’ve clung to the opinion that, since words and communication in general are of prime importance to me, it would not be a good match if the man were not able to express himself – and express himself fairly well.
I know that is judgemental, so am debating my stance.
Those men who post a photo that I feel indifferent too but who also complete their profiles with meaningful words and insights into who they are still get my attention. I can be won over by well used words.
I will not be won over by good looks alone, and cannot be won over by a guy who obviously does not care for his health or appearance, despite how well he uses his words.
I am working to refine a sixth sense understanding of what is written by these guys. Of course I know there will be great men who simply are not comfortable in the online format. Some are not comfortable typing at all. Others might be great communicators in person but freeze up when it comes to writing.
So I continue this work of trying to read between or behind the lines.
I am donning my Ms Sherlock Holmes hat.
Other than guessing, and sending out email after email, what else can a girl do?
I could use some more suggestions – anyone have some great ideas to share? Any insights or suggestions?
I promise to read and (maybe) try to apply with an open mind.